In the Shadows

Most important deeds should be completed in the night.

Hoo haa heeeyyy

Can you feel it can you feel it? It's in the air breathing.
Just walk down the halls. It will greet you in the end.
But do not pretend to know the road.  For it is swollen in glitches. Do not forget to pass through the second door to reach teh stairs. At the top the very fabric of the clothing will change, and you will be able to swim in the violet grasslands beneeath. Oh do not fear the aura, olivia, you have plenty of time to do it. It cycles at .991 of a bbpm, so do not fret. He comes to train. Hop on! whoooooooooooooooooooooshssssss .sssssss. in the depths of the sea. It awaits. Great pillars of green frown upon the very remains of the floor. The gloom.. was dark. The shadows reigned triumphant, but frail torches of the guards led them astray. Into the bounty of the ship we go.

Do not tread softly. Do not. The fish of this realm demand strength, stampededing! They need earthquakes to shatter their eggs apart and for them to grow. STAMMPEDE.

And they left. Into darkness, the brickyard turmoil of the untermill took over. With little eysigt, the sharkweasel could not sustain a fiull sprint - or whatever it does. Do not avoid the phantomsof purple! Do not take the aura of the truth graham! Take the lantern of heat. It will burn our enemies, and give you baby cats, also known as kittens. Oh kittens are cute!

Into the abyss they traveled. The circles bends, sweeps, traverses, and even a dead end. Do not be frightened of the strength chaos and inner self disentification, this cave is not a tomb. It is a dance floor. And the lights shattered the cliff dwellings, and the illuminated dancefloor cam ineo tbeing.

The chanedelair was marvelous. Its very innards held the suns power and marvel. You could not evefathom of how he moved, until you saw the serving roller cskate girl from the 40s come up, take the globe, and begin skating into the ack alley. Oh no, the fun part is done!

Down into the skies we pummited.
"You just had to take the dangerous way home, didn't you philip
!"
"Do not take the kentucky fried chicken! Oh mm im  so hungry. Maybe this post bneeds to be delayed for a bit.

Yes..

Cook etime

Every Other Way

Heart don't fail me now,
Cause there is no time to waste.
Don't shut me out, we shouldn't wait another day.
I've searched for you, on my hearts high speed chase.

Hear me out, may be the only chance to say,
Hold me now.
I've said it every other way.

O-Chem

Gregorian Chant.

Diastereomers.

Alkyl shifts.

Ring expansion.

Inception.

Bedtime.

Self-Reflexivity

As I sat on the bus riding home this very early morning, I stared out the window opposite my seat. To the north shone the few remaining windows, the lit I-35W bridge, and a cloudy heaven. The bus made its way across the Washington Avenue bridge westbound, and the world slowly edged its way across the bus window.

In the window, traveling its way across this world, was my face.

Of course, I had to utilize what I've gained in German film class to analyze the situation. The mise-en-scene was just too blatant to be ignored.

My face. Traveling across the world.
But not really me.
Just a reflection.
But who am I, but a reflection of what people think me to be?
What people wish me to be?

Run Lola Run

Ok, before I move on, I'm going to say it:

I LOVE THIS MOVIE.


It's like the first time I saw Stardust. Completely enthralled. I'd say it's actually more like the first time I read Tick Tock by Dean Koontz, or the first time I heard "Alejandro" on the radio. The entire movie was engaging - techno soundtrack, a "reset" button to life, yet always subjected to fate.

Which I did not enjoy too much.

Pre-destination and "butterfly effects" are unprovable, undeniable, unfounded beliefs that humans are subjects of fate - and any alteration of our "life paths" will subject us to a COMPLETELY different set of lives.

Path 1: Lady bumps into lady on street. Lady with baby becomes bad mother, loses child to social care, STEALS another baby in her rage.
Path 2: Lady avoids lady on street. Lady with baby wins the lottery.
Path 3: Lady does not see lady on street. Lady with baby becomes a religious convert.

Although these three life paths are portrayed with beautifully montaged photographic stills, I still can't ever trust that lives are planned out that way. Who would want to go through that kind of planning? What a boring job.

Example 1:
God sits at his desk. "Ok.. so today, Scott will wake up at exactly 7:56:34 AM. He will open his left eye first, then his right eye. If he should open his right eye first, he's GOING TO DIE TODAY. If he opens his left eye first, he will go pee merrily then get completely screwed on his O-Chem I test instead."

Dear Reader, it is time for bed.

Daylight Savings Time

If only Benjamin Franklin knew how much time I needed to save to actually make it worthwhile.

Ah, but the discussion of homework and the daily routine would bore (literally) the very kidneys out of your torso, dear Reader, and fund my college years through black markets in Guatemala.

The apartment was cleaned up by me this weekend. Surprisingly only 4 stacked beer cans have accumulated since Friday. Congratulations 127.

We watched Pokemon for 7 hours straight today = 4 movies and 3 episodes. I havn't felt so settled in a long time. Our newly opened living room floor (thanks to no Rape Cushion until we acquire our house) allowed me to sprawl out for the afternoon, and lounge. Deformable body mechanics, oven-baked pizza, and inane, repetitive Pokemon movies.

It only could have been better with you on the floor, too.

There's this drink called "Super Chill." It's like the Cub brand of Dr. Pepper. Yes, dear Reader, DP is the highborn of pops, the principal Pop, the superb soda - but, but, but, dear Reader, Super Chill is cheaper (store brand), and it has this funky sugar in it. It's aight.

Thank ******'s deity that this posting utility has an undo button - I accidentally just deleted all of the previous writings and frEAKKED. I probably just would've not posted anything at all if I had to rewrite it.

Truth, dear Reader, truth. Don't do anything twice over unless it's a scientific experiment.
Or sex.

There are currently 5 darts stuck on our living room clock. We like to target practice on it. Ever since our latest target practice today, the clock doesn't run anymore. Oops. I suppose we therefore just saved all the time we would ever need.

No thanks to you Benjamin.

But thanks for your Almanack.

FEELings

Is it a pre-requisite that one must be in a "mood" to generate a blog post, dear Reader? I was debating this recently, as ... well, being emotional tends to be more interesting. But then unintentional thoughts may spill out, and suddenly the Blogger may be in a state of expanded exposition. Which is not the purpose of a blog if one happens to be posting it on their Facebook info box.


My meals for the day:
1) 3 McDoubles
2) a piece of pizza

Somehow I don't feel this is a generous diet for somebody who gets 6 hours of sleep on average. And has a deform test tomorrow.
Shoot.
Well.
I've always wanted to know what I would type on here Iif I let my mind stop and wander.

Guns shooting nazis horses death darkness in the back is there any way to stop it STOP STOP you really.

My roommates are watching Band of Brothers.

Ah, yes. Very good.

One of the greatest feelings in the world is staying up until 3:33 AM (make a wish!) writing essays. Not just one, dear Reader, but three. Although, I must admit, the essay about the "Great" screw took upwards of 10 hours or more. And I still don't like it much.

The other two essays went well (and only totaled to 1 hour for each). Those I just had to talk about EWB though - so, cake, honestly.

I don't know, I kind of like it as the minutes drip on. Literally, time feels sluggish and I swear this couch is falling into the floor (or is that my mind?). Um, yes, below is the essay I wrote. Enjoy.

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The Versatility of Simplistic Engineering

Enter "Greatest Engineering Feats of all Time" into a search engine and one will be swamped with massive projects such as the Great Pyramids, the Great Pharos Lighthouse of Alexandria, and the Great White Fleet. The integral factor playing into the “Greatness” of these marvels was their foundation on and construction using simple machines. In the absence of cranes, the height of the Great Pyramids required mud-brick inclined planes¹. The dumbwaiter utilized to hoist fire fuel in the Great Pharos Lighthouse necessitated pulleys². Lastly, Theodore Roosevelt’s Great White Fleet employed the propulsion of propellers, whose origins resides in the Archimedean screw³. Throughout history, civilization’s “Great” achievements have been founded on these simple (yet profound) engineering innovations. Although the ISS floats in the heavens above and the LHC smashes particles below, I consider the greatest engineering accomplishment of civilization to be a simple machine: the screw. Through its ubiquitous applications in the ancient, medieval, and modern periods of human history, the screw has proven that simplistic engineering is timeless in its versatility.

The development of the screw is sometimes accredited to Archytas of Tarentum in 400 B.C. Archimedes (3^rd century B.C.) applied the first use of screw principle to his namesake screw. Observing the necessity to irrigate farmland that eluded the floods of the Nile and to siphon these same floodwaters away from cities, Archimedes developed his namesake screw. Utilizing the simplicity of the screw, his design also drew water out of the holds sinking ships, and could be prominently viewed as it lifted water to hydrate the Hanging Gardens of Babylon. Further in history, the screw revolutionized the wine and olive oil (staples of a Mediterranean diet) industry in 50 A.D., when the first direct-screw press (Figure 1) began crushing grapes and olives in Pompeii⁶. The

Figure 1: Direct-screw press

direct-screw press extracted a much higher yield than the basket press, the method employed at the time. Ancient medical professionals modified the screw to make bone drills (similar to today’s corkscrew) that removed diseased tissue and bone shards from patients.

            In the Middle Ages, the screw again proved its versatility. In 1441, Gutenberg utilized the screw principle for one of civilization’s most impactful inventions: the movable type printing press. Gutenberg based his design on the wine presses of the Rhine Valley, and further embedded the screw press in humanity’s prominent engineering marvels. In Gutenberg’s version of letterpress printing, a screw transmits pressure through a metal plate to cause an impression on paper. In its finalized state, a single Gutenberg printing press could produce 3,600 pages per workday, as compared to 40 pages per workday by hand-printing. Just as Gutenberg proved the versatility of screws with the screw press, the Dutch proved the versatility of the Archimedean screw. In 1634, the Netherlands began using windmills to power Archimedean screw-pumps to reclaim land from under sea level. These land reclamations have resulted in over 3,000 unique tracts of land known as polders. Presently, these polders comprise about 27% of the Netherland’s land and contain over 60% of the country’s population, heavily in part due to utilization of Archimedes screw. Although methods of powering the screw-pumps have changed since 1634, the Archimedean screw remains the most effective way of pumping water out of the Netherland’s polders⁷. The medieval period also saw a prevalence of screws in warfare. Squires invented the screwdriver in the 1500s to assemble suits of armor onto knights. Screws attached the wheel-lock firearm, the first self-igniting firearm, onto the wooden stocks of early firearms. Mechanical screws wound up strings on crossbows and ballista’s, allowing powerful releasing of bolts at enemy lines.

            With the advent of the Industrial Revolution, the screw became well established in prominent machine tools, again proving its versatility. This was heavily due in part to Joseph Whitson’s standardization for screw threads in 1841. Screws became easily replicable upon standardization, allowing mass production. The British railway system adopted the “British Standard Whitworth” to allow universal screw coupling (which attaches the vehicles of a train together). Standardized, mass produced screws were used in a multitude of “machine tools,” mechanically powered devices first commercial available during the Industrial Revolution. Between 1763 and 1775, James Watt produced a workable steam engine. The industrialist John Wilkinson developed a new boring machine to help Watt improve his steam engine. Boring machines use gradation screws to adjust the diameter of circles cut – thereby Wilkinson assisted Watt in boring the precise holes needed for his steam engine’s cylinders. Perhaps one of the most important applications of the screw was the screw propeller patented by Francis Smith. The first test of his screw propeller was appropriately on the steamship Christened the “S.S. Archimedes.”

Figure 2: The three screw propellers of the Titanic

The screw propeller quickly gained wide acceptance as the preferred means of propulsion on steamships (powering gigantic vessels, such as the Titanic in Figure 2) and later also became the preferred means of propulsion in the field of aviation. Other devices that employ the screw turbine include helicopters, fans, turbines, windmills, and submarines. The versatility of the screw has allowed its use in a multitude of engineering professions.

            The screw has a considerable potential impact on the future of engineering. Already, screws are used to make delicate adjustments of micrometers and carburetors of gasoline engineers. Modern day boring machines can control the diameter of a drilled hole to within 10 micrometers. Innovative uses of Archimedes screw have provided breakthroughs in energy generation and sewage treatment. In Yorkshire, U.K., two Archimedes screws have been installed in series down the slope of a hill. A nearby river will be diverted over a white-water rafting course. When the river is high, water will flow over the course and into the turbines, generating enough electricity to save the Yorkshire Water sewage treatment facility 127,000 pounds per year. In addition, when the river level is low, the turbines can act as pumps to pump water uphill to increase the flow over the course. This project is unique as it is the only system in the world where the Archimedes screws act as pumps and generators. A particular prominent modified version of the screw is the ball screw, which converts screw rotation to linear movement along a shaft. Ball screws are heavily used in aviation and missiles in a new concept called “fly-by-wire,” which replaces manual flight control. As the prevalence of unmanned vehicle warfare increases (such as through drone missiles and robotic warfare), the necessity for extremely precise ball screws will increase.

            The versatility of the screw has made this simple machine an integral part of many of mankind’s great engineering marvels. From crushing grapes in ancient Italy, to turbine propulsion for the Titanic, to the precise gradation of micrometers in microscopes, the screw has proved a highly adaptable engineering tool. For its ubiquitous applications in everyday life and in assisting the next batch of engineering breakthroughs, perhaps it is time the screw also earns the title, “Great.”

Wontons

I always enjoy going to Village Wok late at night (note: Happy Hour). Nothing really beats $3 wontons to distill the mind and heal the heart (but never the intestines). The absurd messages hidden inside a greasy balls of death (note, I'm still talking about wontons) must be the easiest and most visible proof of the "Infinite Monkey Theorem" (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Infinite_monkey_theorem).

To this, dear Reader, I say "cheers." Let's go spend $3 (plus tax).

Operation Himmler

I've always enjoyed reading about September 1st, 1939 (arguably I should be referring to August 31st, 1939). To justify its invasion of Poland in WWII, Germany preemptively initiated a multitude of "false flag" SS operations, umbrella'ed under the term "Operation Himmler" (also known as Operation Canned Goods - I'm not entirely sure on this minor name). Operation Himmler is considered the first military operation of WWII in Europe.


My favorite of the operations is the Gleiwitz incident, in which a troop of German saboteurs commandeered a Polish broadcasting station, and sent anti-German messages into the airspace. Of course somebody always has to get shot, lethally injected, and dressed as a Germanic saboteur, so a Polish sympathizer was brought along and left for the aftermath. The Third Reich claimed this dead Polish sympathizer's death (along with 20 other incidents brought on by "Polish aggression" - now that's a new one) to justify Germany's invasion of Poland with 1.8 million troops.

Now, you may ask - why, Great Scott - why do you enjoy this blend of irony, injustice, and absurdity? Because, dear Reader, because it is so ambiguous. To a knowledgeable Western world Reader, Operation Himmler (Canned Goods) is terribly obvious - of course Germany planned all of these incidents. However, if you were an untamed Yak roaming down from the Russian steps and you saw a dead German citizen in the snows of Poland, you'd be all "mrrrwaaaahhHHHHH! Damn Poles and their aggression!" and demand a sausage, as you ambled a long way, and are really hungry. After a nice 10' sausage link and a nap in the field across the street from the broadcasting station, you'd hear the sirens and the war drums and the charging Polish cavalry attempting to outmaneuver Panzers, and you'd think "What the hell, Poland? Really? Why did you try to take on these guys?" and get really confused.

Oh dear Reader, this incident would be so ambiguous to you, if you were a Russian Yak (please pronounce this with a Russian accent - it sounds so much better).

And there you have it, dear Reader. The essence of this blog, and the essence of me. I fear I have given too much, or I fear that I have given too little. For in reality, what is reality? Now I've simply confused myself, and dear Reader, please follow http://itscakeforkillers.blogspot.com/ if you want words from a confused Man.